I just found out that Zimbo passed away.  This is one of those moments when it is undeniable the impact and value my online friends contribute to my life. He will be sorely missed.

Hi guys! I’ve been home alone with the baby a bunch lately and it’s not so easy to type these days with her. She keeps stealing my mouse and closing my browser and such, but we are having a lovely time together eating onions and raw mushrooms and baked apples and yogurt… Making simple smoothies and mashed potatoes and such.  We pick the flower stalks of arugula plants and she munches the flowers happily watching Doctor WHO with me hehehe… And she cooperates more with me painting than me typing so here are some fresh flowers for you. I hope the signs of spring are as inspirational and glorious for you as they are for me!

 
Both of these are about 10.5″ x10.75″ on 1/2″ plywood.
go forth and be joyfully productive
Onward and upward!

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Edit… Apparently, I missed a painting. Here it is too

So all of a sudden, life is more exciting than usual.
In March, my work is going to the public library in Oak Ridge.
New work going into Artifactia in Bearden.
In June, work will be shown in the Tomato Head at Market Square in Oak Ridge – then in July it goes to their other location in West Knoxville…
And in April, I have to write to the Stir Fry Cafe about scheduling with them.

I’m just all bubbly inside… hehehehe…. Life feels like such a bubbling brook of excitement and joy right now!  I just had to share!

 
Tulips Burst Forth From the Darkness of Winter
Acrylic on Plywood
Slightly larger than 12″x15″

Childlike… In the face of the stresses of life and the gloomy moods being flung about, I still feel childlike…
In spite of being reminded that all sorts of horrible things are happening around the country, I still feel free and happy in myself.
In spite of being reminded that I’m supposed to feel adult and responsible and parent-like, I still feel like myself and even reborn continuously.

How can life be bad or sad or stressful when the sun shines and I am surrounded by such love from my friends and the Universe?

A side note – I spent a bunch of time this morning working on my Etsy site – fixing/lowering prices, removing sold pieces and adding new ones. If you’re interested, take a gander here:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/OceanStarr?ref=pr_shop_more

January is, indeed, the cruelest month for sales, but I recently picked up a couple commissions in anticipation of tax return monies and some people who had paused their installment plans say they can resume shortly so I’m hoping with Valentines Day and Mothers Day on the horizons, business will pick up.

More good news – Seren’s big enough to go to Kid Care at my gym now so I can go back to working out.
Somehow I think my separation anxiety will be worse than hers… but I am SO excited to be able to get my muscles back in order as spring and summer look my way!

If no one’s making your day, make it yourself!
With love as always
Onward and upward
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Childhood love flits in the memories of my heart like butterflies
22.5″x35.75″
Acrylic on Plywood with Texturing

We’ve been working on the house trying to get it safe and happy for a more mobile baby and my laptop is currently in a difficult spot for me to sit and type and read. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to visit around as much… I’m dying to get around and see what everyone’s up to… But that is the way it is right now.

In the meantime, I’ve been meditating on memories of childhood love… before bills and schedules and all that.

I also just finished reading @plantinthewindow‘s latest book.
I took my sweet time with it because I do find it so exquisite… a meditation on the joys and agonies and joys again in human life – uncomplicated and unchanged by the passing of time and corporeal decay… but also shaded by the same.
I am greatly hoping I can find the time to write a nice scholarly paper about it. I know it’s not in the style a lot of people read for “fun”… I can’t imagine reading Game of Thrones of Shades of Grey (guessing I got those titles right). My education in literature has made “candy books” difficult for me to get interested in. I would like to see John’s work get the recognition I believe it deserves as a truly masterful piece! Also meditating on how to make that happen.

Gotta run for now – baby calls
As always with love
Onward and upward
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Fear.
A tremor in anticipation of possible unpleasant futures does nothing to prevent their occurrence.  Anger does not erase past miseries.
Fear only increases unpleasant feelings right now. 
Anger is like inflammation… appropriate, and a part of a process, but not something to be continued any longer than necessary.
Love.
Love echoes and ripples and soothes. Love brings peace and clear mind. Love brings inspiration toward solutions and calm in the unpredictable and sometimes painful world.

Safety.
Safety is only an illusion as is danger. There is no controlling the whims and anger and lashings from others… save by sending love in the face of ire.

But it HURTS to love when I should be angry! But they don’t DESERVE a smile when they’re sending cruelty! Those are crimes against humanity itself! How can I smile and laugh?

A smile does not mean I accept the atrocities, only that I am trying not to let them poison the inside of me. My smile is a shield against the inflammation in others and, hopefully, a balm to their souls as well.

Yesterday, Seren and I spent about an hour in CVS (getting her some Hyland’s Teething Drops). It was a grey, chilly, rainy day and she was bored in the house and whiny. We stopped at one of those childrens’ ball displays and I squatted in the floor with her while she played with the balls and bounced around. I didn’t wear a watch and I don’t know how long we were there, but three or four people stopped and watched her for a long time, beaming at her innocent joy. Do you think they carried that with them? How long? I know I’m still carrying that and will at least for the rest of today.

Angry people get angry at me for not expressing enough anger to match theirs, like I’m somehow endorsing evil by not lashing out against it.
I don’t. I won’t. I can’t afford to. The poison of anger hurts my soul and I don’t want that. It’s my life and that is something I’m free to choose for myself.

Try to have a peaceful day
With love, as always,
Onward and upward
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Still thinking about gun control… I can’t discard the idea that disarming the population is silly for lots of reasons. I’m bumping into a lot of discussion about our “gun culture” and talk about censorship “for the CHILDREN”.

I find it abhorrent to use children as pawns to emotionally manipulate people. Our children (white Americans) are no more or less valuable than brown children in foreign lands being impacted by American military actions.

Too many mothers I talk to say “what if it was YOUR daughter shot in school?”
I say that’s an emotional, not a logical statement and no, it wouldn’t change my mind.

Entertainment follows popular culture follows entertainment. Try not to mistake the symptoms of cultural illness for the cause. I ran a server for a first person shooter game for many years and really enjoyed blowing up cartoons on my computer after my college classes. It was a great stress relief for me.
I’m also a turn the other cheek kind of pacifist. I never once mistook a cartoon on my screen for a human life. I avoid killing anything – plants, bugs, animals. My love for life and awareness of inter-connectivity isn’t confused by a silly game.

Ah well. I’m glad it’s not my job to make legislation. How on Earth do we heal a culture that doesn’t see the light in other living beings? Let’s hope that the idea of a new golden age is valid – these prophecies that trickle toward us from older cultures…

Love is contagious. I believe that.

A couple of this week’s paintings for your enjoyment. They’re all for sale. I just don’t post prices and such here because this is my “friend” space. The sales space is on facebook (Ocean Starr Cline).

Strange Fruit
Acrylic on plywood
10.5″x15″
I grew up in rural Alabama. Long roads and open fields are in my heart always. I also specialized in African American and post-colonial literature in college. Incidentally, tropical birds are also a big part of my life. So “Strange Fruit” has many, many meanings for me.

Partners Reaching Up
Acrylic, textile, and tissue on canvas
16″x20″

A celebration of life. That is all

With love as always
Onward and upward
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A topic on my mind this evening: curating life…

As some of you know, I am a zen practitioner. I am also (obviously), an artist.

This thought occurs to me this evening in my meditations and online wanderings. I hate to use the word “you” as it seems quite targeted, but it’s difficult to work the words otherwise.

Do you curate your life?

I interact with galleries frequently and have entertained the idea of becoming a curator myself.  To be a curator in a gallery or a museum means to carefully select just the right items to compose a larger picture, a larger story in a location.

How many things ask for one’s time… pets, children, mealtimes, meetings, jobs, automotive inconveniences… Some of these things are important. By this, I mean, if they are not attended to, there will be negative consequences that Matter. Some of them have negative consequences that matter. And some have negative consequences that do not matter. It is worth considering just what we spend our minutes doing.

That is all.

We have limited time in our tiny little lives. Don’t think I have any deadline or crisis in mine. Just a meditation I wanted to share.

Be blessed
With love, as always

onward and upward,
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1: Continued firearm contemplation:

As I continue to think about the firearm debate, one question (with its offshoots) has really stood out to me. Does is make any sense for the Federal Government to legislate for the nation? Do the citizens of Alabama, for example, need the same gun control policies as California or New York? What about rural citizens vs. urban citizens.
I’m starting to think this is best handled on a more local level. The more people I talk to, the more I see huge differences in perception of firearms and their benefits/risks/uses. Our country is just too large and diverse to have a single policy maybe…

2: Baby update

She took her first couple tentative steps last night and this morning. Also likes super garlicky hummous and grapefruit juice. Still plays with her ukulele for extended periods of time and is getting better and better at plucking the strings with appropriate force etc.

The lady playing the harp, when she started plucking strings, said “Do you hear the angels?”
Talk about an awkward moment for me! I don’t want to open a whole new can of worms regarding religious belief or anything like that, but I can see a lot of challenging conversations in my future regarding different belief systems.  I have a very difficult time being dishonest. It’s just not in me… I prefer to be respectful, but honest, and logic is my best friend.
Ah well… We all muddle through these things one way or another.

3: Art art art…

I paint and I paint. And I paint. I covered over an old piece with tissue yesterday and laid in great swaths of color this morning with Seren on my lap. She has good manners at the easel right now and clearly enjoys being with me while I work. It’s sweet. 
I’m thinking about dogwoods and passion fruit flowers and butterflies and music.

There are many people I know who seem to go from being angry at one thing to being angry at the next… Sometimes even lashing out at me for not being angry too. I’m going to say here what I’d like to say to them lol… because biting one’s tongue isn’t really healthy either (unless it is in the spirit of keeping peace in a low stakes situation).

I have grown weary of being angry and frustrated. I have become bored with stress and tension and I don’t find any benefit anymore in pretending that I can join *you/others* in that expenditure of energy. Anger and frustration with others serves absolutely no constructive purpose in my life. It makes me feel ill in my head and gut. I made an active decision in my life to pursue positive feelings, not because I am blind to injustice and ugliness, but because it makes me feel more well and helps me do good work.

With love as always
Onward and upward
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Just kidding. There was a lot of snow in Knoxville, but I live in Oak Ridge and this was about the worst of it for us.

The ice sure was pretty in a couple spots where the unfrozen water ran off and left this surface behind. 

So right now, I’m painting the spring I want to see and am looking forward to.

Dogwood Morning
Acrylic on canvas
16″x12″

I really appreciate that there’s been a logical and pleasant sharing of ideas on my gun control post! Thanks again to everyone who has helped me to refine my thoughts on the subject.
I do believe it’s important for people to be able to have firearms. Growing up in the South, most firearms were used for hunting or for self-defense on the farm… It’s good to hear viewpoints from people from other various backgrounds and points of view.

I also want to say that my choice to be a stay at home/work at home mother is based on several factors. Childcare is expensive and what I could earn around here doesn’t offset the cost very well. 
I want to be with her during this first year at least which goes by SO fast. I’m selfish like that.
My research and personal perspective on early childhood development makes me want to.
It’s certainly not the best plan for every family… but my father stayed at home with me until I was five and I wouldn’t trade those memories for anything in the Universe! I would love for my daughter to have similar memories to soften the sometimes harsh realities that come as we grow up. 
Onward an upward.
Ever with love
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